I think I have been a little too Missing in Action fo rmy own good. You know relationships are so easy to form, but so hard to maintain.
We all get so busy with things going on in our lives that we sometimes forget to give attention to the people in our lives that we really care about. I know this year I have been so busy with everything that has been going on, and my whole mission of getting my life put together that I've really neglected a lot of the friendships and relationships that mean the most to me. I know there are the relationships with my social cirlce that I've let slip by, but that was a conscious decision. I think after I graduated college, I realized that I really wanted a lot more substance in my life. I wanted quality and not quanity, especially when it came to the people I had in my life. At the same time though, I have been so busy trying to figure out the whole what am I going to do with my life thing, that I've really missed hanging out with my friends. Being in Fresno its been so hard to get away sometimes. It's not that I don't want to, but I just have so much on my plate I just can't find the time to fit it all in.
I really feel so bad for missing out on some of the great things everyone's been doing but at the same time I have to put my future life plan first. I've spent so much time wasting my time, that I'm really determined to get things together and I know that means I've been making a lot of sacrifices. Nothing worthwhile is gained the easy way though, so I'm struggling, and I know It's taking a toll on everyone that's close to me. But I have to do what I have to do, and yeah it fkn blows!
I really am so focused on taking all my entrance tests for my masters programs that It has really been a struggle. Hopefully though, next year, things are a little more settled so that I can spend some realy quality time with everyone. It's not helping that they are all so spread a part now. I was thinking back to how things used to be when I first started college. Everyone was so close, and we all had absolutley nothing going on in our lives. I miss those days!
It's summer ! Yay! So we have all this time on our hands that we've been looking forward to all year. Time to relax, hand out with friends, barbecue. All the summer essentials, and last but not least the endless hours of time spent with our little friend the TV.
This summer, however, I think I have had to really stand up and say - WTF is going on with the networks shows.?
Most of you are probably already DVRing or TiVoing everything these days. But for the times that you decided to turn on the TV this is what you have to look forward to.
Wipeout! and that Crazy Japanese Game show thing! These crazy shows on ABC that is supposed to be entertaining? I mean I love the sucker punch wall, but if they keep doing the same obstacles all summer long I will refuse to watch any more ABC ! Not to mention how ridiculous the Japense show is, it's not even amusing, it's just plain sad and stupid!!!
Wait, before I complete ride off ABC, I would have admit that I really did enjoy this seaons of the bachelorette. I know, sad, pathetic, yes yes. I know it is, but I really was hoooked, and I think we all knew it wasn't going to be Jason. I mean come on, scuba diving vs your own private island?
And the worst show of them all, Celebrity Circus!! I think I only caught about 5 minutes of it flipping through channels but seriously WTF is going on ??
It has been soo unbelievable hott this week. I know that it's always hot back home, but this week has been over the top. I've been trying to run errands for work this week, dropping of some STD cards, but just walking from my car to the door of wherever I'm going has been such a mission!!
But the one thing I really hate about it being this hot, is the funky tan lines I end up with. My arms and shouldes are one color, the rest of my body is another, and my legs have this gradient thing going on. They are darker ont he bottom and slowly lighten as they go up. This is going to take some serious damage control... I don't want to look all spotty for the rest of the summer ! UGH
I've been sitting here studying for my CBEST exam. Why am I taking the CBEST - well it's a pretty long story. The short version is that since I have been in Fresno, the job market hasn't really been working out for me the way I'd hoped. The first position I had was great, except I was paying more for the gas to go back and forth than I was actually earning in a week (not exactly a good idea). So I found a great internship at the local hospital, and I'm really excited about working with the committee and putting together a great event - HOWEVER - I am not getting the money I need to survive out there. So what does this have to do with the cbest ?
I was finding ways to make some extra $ while still having the flexability to go to school, and my internship when I landed on the idea of becoming a substitute. They pay well, you only work like 6 hours and you don't really do much so here I am, studying for the CBEST.
So as I sit here and study and revise the materail, It's starting to drive me nuts. Am I putting the comma where it goes? Did I spell this word correctly? Is that the right root word?
Don't you hate it when you have to second guess yourself? I sure do!!!
I'm not sure when it really happened. I think it started off with me just having a busy schedule, or just learning to be out out on my own, but I fell off the reading wagon. Maybe it was all the reading I had to do for school, or the choice between sitting down with a good book and going out to a good bar that made me stray away. Whatever it was, it lasted for about a good four years. I can probably count on one hand the number of books I read in college, that were'nt required reading.
After realizing that my habitual reading was pretty much at a standstill, I have started to get back into the sway of things. So here's the deal, I'm going to try and create a list of must read books. This way I know I can sit down with a good book, or atleast a book someone out there thinks is worth a read. So if you are a dear friend of mine, or just an avid reader and have some suggestions - PLEASE SHARE!!
In fact, it was almost be a shame not to add your two cents, since this list could be something you might want to look to when your running out of ideas. So now that I've given you some incentive - please add away!!
So I have a confession to make...
Since I've been back in Fresno, I've been pretty lazy to getting the cable or dish hooked up. I've actually been avoiding it so that I won't be stuck in front of the TV (which as you know being in fresno - you couldn't blame me ). I've done it in the hopes that I can actually go do other (more productive things)
But here's the thing, since I only have the network channels to watch, somehow we're catching MTVTres - the Latin MTV channel. I have to confess, I have slowly gotten hooked! I don't know how it happened. I watch their TRL, I watch their TRES or False, the little reality shows - I watch it ALL!
Pathetic ? Yes! Hard to Understand Most of the Time ? Yes! Addicting? Hell Yes!!
Welcome to my lil world!
Here is my attempt on putting my mark on the world wide web. As with most new blogers, I've wanted to have one for some time, I've always had a lot to say, and not nearly enough time. So we'll see where this road takes me, but let's hope that it's an intersting one =)
Enjoy!
- D
